If God Was a Dyke
If God was a dyke she would have a buzz cut and wear flowing, flowery sun dresses in the blistering hot months of summer. She would have deep, brown skin and she would be a follower of the muslim religion. But don’t tell the women who get down on their knees to drink up her knowledge through tears and strap ons.
If God was a dyke, she would drag those ignorant bastards who only believe in putting two puzzle pieces together straight up to heaven. She would open the gates and cry out, “Mary was a lesbian and Jesus had two mothers.” Then she would give them the choice to live a life of luxury or to drop down to monkey suit ridden, disapproving glances within the bowels of hell.If God was a dyke she would ride her bike from church to church on sundays, silently tapping the shoulders of women who aren’t allowed to come back home with their lovers and smacking the priests in the backs of their heads for preaching heterosexuality and then touching little boys.
If God was a dyke she would button her flannels all the way to the top and tie a small bow tie around her neck and wear trouser socks with argyle designs on them in the brutal months of winter. And she would eat her meals in the backs of pick up trucks and beds with springs so old that she could remember the dinosaurs sitting on them.
(via campwannaweep)
